Many people I know are superb athletes. I have a large circle of family and friends who ski race, marathon, dance for hours on end, ride their bikes through woods and on roads for miles and miles…you get the point. Lots of really awesome leg muscles.
My dear friend Tyler recently ran his first half marathon with no training (aside from being a sporty guy) – and the farthest he had run prior to the race was 6 miles.
Then there is me.
While out for a run recently I flashbacked to one of the most traumatic moments of my life - this stupid “Field Day” every 4th and 5th grader in my town had to compete in each Spring. All 6 of the elementary schools went up against each other in relay races, 300 yard dashes, and for the very braze and fit (the popular kids) – the 1 mile run.
This Field Day was the bane of my un-athletic, tall and awkward existence. In the weeks before hand, we had to compete against our classmates in each area of competition to determine our placement on Field Day. For some reason I ended up running the 300-yard dash, and after I was done trailing all my other classmates in my Keds and neon Jam Pants, I dashed myself into the bathroom and threw up in a trashcan.
It was from that moment on that I decided I was un-athletic, horrible at sports, and would never participate in them again. I was placed in the Bean Bag Relay.
In high school I fulfilled my athletic requirements by managing Varsity teams and by taking gym class – hell, I even managed to FAIL gym my junior year by never going. Throughout college I watched all my other friends sweat their days away from my couch. The most strenuous thing I mustered was to drive from my house to the Dining Center 5 blocks away.
When I did try to exercise I put a lot of pressure on my self to go fast, hard and long. I would get angry when I couldn’t just head on out and run 3 miles immediately. I would remedy this frustration at the Baked Potato Bar at dinner.
About 4 ½ years ago, upon moving to New York, I began a consistent yoga practice, which continues to this day. I learned to stop judging my body with anger and frustration, and instead for the first time discovered what it felt like to be okay in the place where I was. To live in that space and be okay with it.
A year and a half ago I began to run, very slowly, on the treadmill at my gym. I didn’t set any goals; I just did it until I didn’t want to do it anymore. That summer I started running outside. I slowly built up a little bit of stamina and strength. Miles and minutes began to add up. I lost a few pounds. I got some muscles, something I thought would be foreign to my body forever. I felt better.
Running 13.1 miles is a big-ass deal for me. I’ve never done ANYTHING this physically exertive in my life. I smoked from high school through college and beyond (don’t worry – not anymore). But I’m excited to do it, and for the first time I know I CAN do it.
In my training book Marathoning For Mortals, the authors write, “We mortals all have the potential to become athletes.”
I finally believe this.